Goldsboro loses a giant. Ernie Haskins made his community better.

It was one week before my wedding when my dad passed away.

I now had to plan a funeral.

Many people would feel lost in that moment, but there was not a question as to who to go to for help.

I knew Ernie Haskins was that person.

When he received us that day, Mr. Haskins walked me and my family to the conference room. He explained everything, from A to Z, to ensure I could make the best decisions.

The service, itself, was top notch — the program crafted with the extra touch of love Mr. Haskins was known for.

His wife even called to check on me late at night when most of the city was sleeping.

She must have known, somehow, that I was awake. And my grief was on her mind.

In those moments, it became clear to me why so many people entrusted the Haskins family with their loved ones’ homecomings. They weren’t just folks who ran a funeral home. They treated you like one of their own.

Mr. Haskins had a calming way about him.

Through the years, I have been called to sing at funerals, and I remember one in particular — how Mr. Haskins pulled me outside and said, “Ruffin, listen. Don’t tear these people all to pieces now.”

Despite the somber occasion, I was nervous. Somehow, Mr. Haskins knew. I believe he brought me outside to coach my nerves.

We shared a laugh over his comment and walked back inside. And I’ll never forget the look he gave me after I sang — the approval he showed me with a nod of his head.

But there was more to the man than his calming presence at the many funerals he directed over his lifetime.

He was a man of service. He knew the Lord.

I can still hear him deliver powerful testimonies in various settings. You don’t forget moments like that.

He was a champion of his community — giving back during back-to-school drives and always, always bringing his daughters, the loves of his life, along to show them that one person can change his or her home for the better.

He was, in a word, a giant.

He employed so many of Goldsboro’s finest and taught them a powerful lesson: never forget those around you.

One of them, Shanita Hobbs, shared these thoughts about Mr. Haskins.

“Rev. Ernie Haskins … I will forever be grateful for being able to serve on the Haskins team for four years. It was such an honor — you introducing me to your world of the funeral home ‘ministry’ and pushing me to get out of my comfort zone,” she said. “You always looked out for us. I appreciate it all. … This still feels like a dream, but I am so glad you were able to live out yours. Love always.”

Love always. 

Nothing truer has ever been said.

That’s the way we all feel — that Mr. Haskins will remain, forever, in our hearts.

I think it’s because he believed in us. He believed in our ability to change this city and this world through our actions.

That’s the reason I know in my heart that one of his sayings will live on forever through his wife, children and the community he loved so well.

“If you don’t help build the float, you don’t ride it on parade day.”

This was his charge to all of us. He understood just how necessary it was for every individual in this community to take ownership of this village we are building for future generations.

And he wanted us to do it together.

You see, Mr. Haskins was a believer in unity. Never did I hear him talk another human being — or competitor — down.

He honored those around him — even creating a calendar that would honor active and retired educators.

To some, that might seem a small gesture, but it meant the world to those of us who received messages about “making Haskins’ calendar.”

In life, it’s often the little things that show people the kind of person you are. 

And if Maya Angelou was right — if “when somebody shows you who they are” you should believe them — then those of us fortunate enough to see who Ernie Haskins was are the better for it.

So, we will miss our friend and pray for his family as they navigate an unimaginable world without him.

And we will take comfort in knowing he has finally earned his wings — that he will forever look over the community he loved so well.

Rest easy, Mr. Haskins. We love you and will never forget the lasting impact you made during your time among us.